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November 15, 2009 at 12:00 AM
WEEEeeeeeeeeee!!! so excited when i saw a new chapter!
they are on the move!!! AWESOME! I can't wait to see what troubles they run into next. this salt lake city situation seems so interesting! I wonder what Chuck is going to do next! stay, or try to leave?
sometimes george seems so dense (what it thinking the check stop wasn't for him - denial maybe?). XD. kinda makes me realize that even though we're inside his head he isn't always the brightest bulb in the pack.
i really liked that background info about creating a childe/child. that was awesome, especially about that Chinese legend one. I wonder how long vamps have been around in the world. 3 million seems like a lot.
But poor little George, his dreams of there being in an 'us vs them' resistance that works has been shot down. I wonder if any of the vamps ever sympathsize with humans (if I'm assuming the vamp was once human him/herself). i wonder how far george can get with his resistant ways until the vampires get fed up about it (if they do).
holy macaroni i love reading each new chapter. even though you say it drags on and that you're trying to make it tighter, it's just so interesting reading stuff about this world. because it works so realistically and logically. great structure!! and awesome chapter. i enjoyed reading it!
they are on the move!!! AWESOME! I can't wait to see what troubles they run into next. this salt lake city situation seems so interesting! I wonder what Chuck is going to do next! stay, or try to leave?
sometimes george seems so dense (what it thinking the check stop wasn't for him - denial maybe?). XD. kinda makes me realize that even though we're inside his head he isn't always the brightest bulb in the pack.
i really liked that background info about creating a childe/child. that was awesome, especially about that Chinese legend one. I wonder how long vamps have been around in the world. 3 million seems like a lot.
But poor little George, his dreams of there being in an 'us vs them' resistance that works has been shot down. I wonder if any of the vamps ever sympathsize with humans (if I'm assuming the vamp was once human him/herself). i wonder how far george can get with his resistant ways until the vampires get fed up about it (if they do).
holy macaroni i love reading each new chapter. even though you say it drags on and that you're trying to make it tighter, it's just so interesting reading stuff about this world. because it works so realistically and logically. great structure!! and awesome chapter. i enjoyed reading it!
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November 12, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I love your story can't wait for more. I thhink they had geo mom's phone tapped. I hope they both go to jeffery.
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November 11, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Oooooooooh, who snitched? *Is curious.*
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November 10, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Thanks for another wonderful update!! Really made my day. Foolish for George to have made that phone call, I thought - iPhones have GPS tracking. But that's what makes him so endearing. Hope Mouse meets his beloved vampire Jeffery again... just looking forward to your next update! Thanks for all your efforts. :-> And also looking forward to Towers!
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November 10, 2009 at 12:00 AM
This story haunts me! My thoughts keeps getting dragged back to it. I must know what’ll happen next. It’s like an addiction. And that phone call he made. Is that in some way going to pop up and bite him in the ass??? O_o
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November 10, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Woot! New chapter! Yeah, the pace of this chapter definitely slowed down a bit, but hey, George deserves a break. And I have a feeling it won't last for too long;)
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November 10, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I loved the chapter. I didnot found it boring at all.
Bye
M
Bye
M
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November 10, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I'm not sure if I've ever commented or not, but I really love this story! George is great. I also really love Jeffrey and think we need more of him again ASAP. ;)
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November 9, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I just want George to get someone who will treat him as more than a food source or terrify him or loan him out. Poor guy. Dont think Wally is the one - and his mom is the snitch, I bet.
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November 9, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I am glad to hear Red Cross Lady is well.
I notice some fellow readers do not like Wally. I think Wally is one of your more affecting charactors; but you've written him so well as a self-effacing sweetie that even some of your readers overlook him! I am glad George is no longer neglecting him. I thought he was stellar hella hot begging for George to fuck him. You do needy so well! And the cum-on-condom messy-with-you-cause-not-a-bit-of-you-is-bad thing!
The Salt Lake setting has got me scared. You set the scene for horror there. That cordon, that city-besieged, it's spooky. Man I so want to see all-out Vampire war-fare erupting, putting the lie to the Eugenist cant. I actually thought that was your theme? Anti-utopian, anti-dystopian? Even in a fantasy-populated world, people will be people and life be life, no event can ever remake our world? No? The Rwanda tease not a foreshadowing? I even thought George might be the dropped match for the vampires' straw palace. So it's to be reproductive rights? How topical given the House-D's near-split on the issue re our nascent HC reform. Well, you keep me guessing!
By the way, so bad of Jeffrey to make light of genocide just to score a point in a political discussion. That is not good deportment at a formal event! When wearing black-tie it is generally better to pretend there are not, nor ever have been, any persons who wear rags, eat dirt to fill their distended bellies, or die of dismemberment. It is polite to agree that we have such little problems licked, or nearly so. If we did not, would we be wearing couture? Of course not, for we are good! So, if we are well-dressed, all wrongs have been redressed. For the evening. To the best of our knowledge. Until Jeffrey.
Rah, Jeffrey!
Oh, I have re-read your story several times, it is so good to me...there is so much, you can't extract it all in one go. I just noticed this:
"When Lord Jeffrey took over my mind… I've never felt anything like that before. Never. It was instant; one minute I was about to scream, next – nothing. He stopped me in my tracks and he didn't break a sweat. And later … when he was…" Wally paused.
"Later, when he was?" I prompted. "What?"
Yes, Wally. What? Whatwhatwhatwhatwhat?
Oh, before I go, a word of encouragement: Several times in your notes, you have admitted a chapter was hard to grind out, and charactorized it as "filler" or "bridging" or some such term. Well those chapters have been without fail excellent. They have been riveting, full of realism, meaty, robust. The hard work you put into them is effective. It is felt, it is enjoyed. The settings and new characters set like bones and knit into a new body that lives for me. George's world expands and he runs a little more freely through its horrors and wonders.
And you should write a story about "Saffire Star Bedazzle." It would work. If you wrote it. It would. And I'd read the hell out of it.
Now pick an artist to do a Jeffrey portrait and I will commission it. Just point me to them. Then you must help them to realize him according to your impeccable vision.
I notice some fellow readers do not like Wally. I think Wally is one of your more affecting charactors; but you've written him so well as a self-effacing sweetie that even some of your readers overlook him! I am glad George is no longer neglecting him. I thought he was stellar hella hot begging for George to fuck him. You do needy so well! And the cum-on-condom messy-with-you-cause-not-a-bit-of-you-is-bad thing!
The Salt Lake setting has got me scared. You set the scene for horror there. That cordon, that city-besieged, it's spooky. Man I so want to see all-out Vampire war-fare erupting, putting the lie to the Eugenist cant. I actually thought that was your theme? Anti-utopian, anti-dystopian? Even in a fantasy-populated world, people will be people and life be life, no event can ever remake our world? No? The Rwanda tease not a foreshadowing? I even thought George might be the dropped match for the vampires' straw palace. So it's to be reproductive rights? How topical given the House-D's near-split on the issue re our nascent HC reform. Well, you keep me guessing!
By the way, so bad of Jeffrey to make light of genocide just to score a point in a political discussion. That is not good deportment at a formal event! When wearing black-tie it is generally better to pretend there are not, nor ever have been, any persons who wear rags, eat dirt to fill their distended bellies, or die of dismemberment. It is polite to agree that we have such little problems licked, or nearly so. If we did not, would we be wearing couture? Of course not, for we are good! So, if we are well-dressed, all wrongs have been redressed. For the evening. To the best of our knowledge. Until Jeffrey.
Rah, Jeffrey!
Oh, I have re-read your story several times, it is so good to me...there is so much, you can't extract it all in one go. I just noticed this:
"When Lord Jeffrey took over my mind… I've never felt anything like that before. Never. It was instant; one minute I was about to scream, next – nothing. He stopped me in my tracks and he didn't break a sweat. And later … when he was…" Wally paused.
"Later, when he was?" I prompted. "What?"
Yes, Wally. What? Whatwhatwhatwhatwhat?
Oh, before I go, a word of encouragement: Several times in your notes, you have admitted a chapter was hard to grind out, and charactorized it as "filler" or "bridging" or some such term. Well those chapters have been without fail excellent. They have been riveting, full of realism, meaty, robust. The hard work you put into them is effective. It is felt, it is enjoyed. The settings and new characters set like bones and knit into a new body that lives for me. George's world expands and he runs a little more freely through its horrors and wonders.
And you should write a story about "Saffire Star Bedazzle." It would work. If you wrote it. It would. And I'd read the hell out of it.
Now pick an artist to do a Jeffrey portrait and I will commission it. Just point me to them. Then you must help them to realize him according to your impeccable vision.