schedule
April 2, 2009 at 12:00 AM
This story was so hot... Seriously my computer just caught on fire. I'd love to see some more with these characters, especially something with a little kink... and I really hope you update The Dragon as well. I've been waiting for that for ages.
schedule
October 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Chapter 1: Well, you have raunchy down pat. That was scorching. I wonder how many women DON'T entertain the idea of two men for one woman? To me, having the two men enjoy each other was frosting on the cake. If you go forward with this, I wouldn't even mind some more solid slash between the two men. But I enjoyed it as it was, too. It took me a minute to figure out Danny was the girl, but otherwise this actually had a small amount of plot to go along with the hot sex (not that it's a requirement for me LOL).
It's well-written and I didn't get confused about what body part was going where, which happens in some stories. Nicely done!
________________
As I remember, you appreciate corrections:
"She usually played the roll of ruthless " - role
"His entire body shuddered as her took her face" - as he took?
"he set her stop Raven’s prone form " - atop? And you mean supine, not prone. The meanings are very specific.
It's well-written and I didn't get confused about what body part was going where, which happens in some stories. Nicely done!
________________
As I remember, you appreciate corrections:
"She usually played the roll of ruthless " - role
"His entire body shuddered as her took her face" - as he took?
"he set her stop Raven’s prone form " - atop? And you mean supine, not prone. The meanings are very specific.