Reviews for The Monster Under My Bed - Originals

person kirjava01

schedule August 21, 2012 at 12:00 AM

Still got me on the edge of my seat. I think I know where things are heading then they take a sudden left turn. I wonder if we'll get to see any more of Logan? It's about time something good happened to Brett- just hope they can work out a way to understand each other better! Definitely looking forward to more :)

person Anon

schedule August 21, 2012 at 12:00 AM

Is the words the 'kitty' used Turkish? Apparently part of his sentence translates as 'Balin's lover'.

I adore this chapter . . . don't know where to begin! I love that you're finally elaborating on what the monster is and his heritage; it's bringing about a complexity and depth that makes the story unique, something more than a two-dimensional erotica that so many stories here aspire to, it's like you're reaching for more. I was slightly confused about the elf though, it makes me wonder why - if the other two are Balin's parents - the elf tagged along with the two. It was very suspenseful too, because - for one terrifying moment - I thought the monster may have been claiming him so that others of his kind could not, meaning that the three monsters may have been there to harm him in some way. It was excellent suspense. The drama and angst too were well done, some of the imagery you used was so beautiful and meaningful, it makes me think you are an author to watch out for, with much potential.

Whether it is an illusion or real . . . the fangirl in me really wants to just say 'real', but I suppose I ought to elaborate . . .

I think for the monster to be a part of his mind and nothing more would be too cliché, I mean it's a storyline even "Buffy" tackled and that wasn't exactly the most serious of shows in the entertainment industry . . . so I think (or hope) that this isn't the case as it'd be too predictable. How I would interpret it is that *this* world is the fantasy, *this* is what is not real, because - for some reason - the boy belongs to the monster's world. He is essentially invisible here, he's an outcast always in pain, he even reacts to what is essentially childhood rape *far* differently to a human child would, and - although he is arguably human in some of his response - he seems too complex and sometimes 'odd' to be human to me. My interpretation so far is that he isn't truly a part of our world, merely a shadow within it, and so he is actually a part of the monster's world.

I love your story, there's just something about it that keeps me checking the site each day desperate for updates. I really love it.

Ah, this is the reviewer "Ethel" by the way XD I was too lazy to sign in before, and for some insane reason 'Ethel' popped into mind.

person alinnapuomi

schedule August 21, 2012 at 12:00 AM

The chapter answered some but not all, but I figure I'll keep my mouth shut and wait to see if they're all answered by the end. If not, I know who to complain to ^^
I'm glad that we got to find out a little more about past events though. It helps to piece things together.
I clicked add on Facebook :/ It didn't work somehow, perhaps. But I think I will create a new account specific to writing (or... I dunno what else you can use for that type of thing, we'll see), so it'll be easier to either add me to skype or email. Both username and email address are on my profile <3

person dw

schedule August 21, 2012 at 12:00 AM

oulalala, gettin' very much interesting here
and yes please, more smut, it's my middle name

and who is this 'Arthur' you speak of?

-ohhhh, i get you, hahaha, the pbs show Arthur
and no, dw: Davon W, I get that a lot with the initial

person Ethel

schedule August 19, 2012 at 12:00 AM

I *love* the latest chapter.

It was so touching to see that humanity within the monster; making the reader doubt his motives and reasons, making him complex and detailed, something three-dimensional with paradoxical behaviour and actions. It was a nice break to see the intimacy and kindness, breaking up the drama and tragedy for a while, so that the story rather ebbs and flows in its pain and comfort.

Personally I think the parents are most evil. The demon has such complex behavioural patterns he's impossible to judge at this stage: is he a mere animal acting on instinct, did he start evil but grow to have feelings, did he have some sort of plan from the start or hidden motives to protect the boy? I like to assume the best about him at the moment. His friend was a douche, yes, but at least he gave him unconditional kindness and sympathy, and - maybe - he's just trying to make the boy jealous, or - even if he isn't - he's still there a friend, he never abandoned the boy. The parents though . . . neglect is tantamount to abandonment, and that it perhaps the worst sin of all.

The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.

They are so indifferent to him, so cold to him, and now the homophobic rather is *rejecting* him to his very core! His attitude essentially tells the boy that there's something wrong with him, something freakish and abominable, and that is a further rejection that breaks the boy down and makes him feel as if he has no place in society. They are bullying him. They are stealing away his purpose. Worst is that they are as invisible to the boy (and the reader) as he is to them, and so we never see *why* they do what they do or even if they care at all . . . they are horrid.

person Aromanight