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September 4, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Well, I wasn't expecting that ending....you keep throwing me through a loop, lol.
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September 4, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Hey this is soooo different from anything I've read here on this website...or any other website! Its so full of awesomeness and I want a monster of my own! Great writing !
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September 4, 2012 at 12:00 AM
"Balin has been arrested for child-molesting" i wouldn't be surprised if that did happened, lol, and great story, nice update! i hope that in the end Balin and Brett end up together, even when there are obstacles in between ^^
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September 4, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Wow, I'm not sure what's going on and I can't pretend to understand, but keep going.
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September 1, 2012 at 12:00 AM
anywho i love your story always have and always will i registered for this story and no other lol
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September 1, 2012 at 12:00 AM
ok so im wondering if now he'll have multiple mates... or will this start a major issue
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September 1, 2012 at 12:00 AM
That was one epic WTF moment in chapter eleven XD
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September 1, 2012 at 12:00 AM
First of all, very effective review bait you've laid. I shall dutifully comment and FB like. Can't miss anything of this.
I'd also like to commend you on your update pace. You keep me coming back for more and I haven't had to wait months or years for a single chapter. I think there is a lot of merit in getting it written down and not worrying about editing until the end. The editing and critiquing process seems to kill the creative juices for a lot of authors. Normally, I include typos and edits in my reviews. I'm going to avoid doing that with you.
And wow. This chapter wasn't at all what I was expecting. I thought Balin would go back for his clothes and find Logan camping out in Brett's room. Which might be happening. I don't know. I like that about first person narration. The not knowing bit.
Sure, I figured out Balin was not the one cuddling, because there is always trouble when a character doesn't open their eyes before smexing up folks in their bed, but even with the wilderness descriptions, I was surprised. More so because I'd put Soren in a little box marked 'Not Smutable'. And not because angry warrior elves aren't hot enough. (Okay, I admit, the smex factor there has nothing to do with being an elf. Rather, a lot of things are compensating for any pansy elf stereotypes that automatically get tacked on by using the word Elf.) I'd pegged Soren as some sort of disgruntled father of Balin, trying to find fault with his son's mate, and had to go back and reread some bits to clear up my confusion. Soren explained they all help raise the kids before they can have one of their own. Congrats Brett on fucking the babysitter of your mate (<-I couldn't find a decent card to send with this sentiment). Whether father or babysitter, plenty of shock value there. Besides, Soren was supposed to be off somewhere, spreading the word the Atlantean treaty was null and void. Not snuggling the sad Earthling. Definitely not what Balin meant by keeping Brett company. There is a little kid in my head singsonging 'somebody's in trouble'. Another voice is pointing out Brett totally started it. Really dude, there was hair involved where there wasn't hair a scant few hours before. Suspect something.
But ultimately, Soren has been very naughty. Especially -when- he told Brett to open his eyes. Very very naughty. There is some psychological twistiness in how he operates. NOT COMPLAINING.
I might grumble if Soren orchestrated this just to piss off the human. That isn't playing fair. Or nice.
A little worried about the bite Soren gave him. Was it a mark? Will it help the virus spread? Kinda icky if this was orchestrated to troubleshoot the malfunctioning virus. Does Balin have any rights about who marks Brett? Shouldn't someone have given Brett a memo if he could be unwittingly marked?
So many questions. A sure sign someone is keeping me in that happy space between Entertained and In Suspense. Thank you!
I'd also like to commend you on your update pace. You keep me coming back for more and I haven't had to wait months or years for a single chapter. I think there is a lot of merit in getting it written down and not worrying about editing until the end. The editing and critiquing process seems to kill the creative juices for a lot of authors. Normally, I include typos and edits in my reviews. I'm going to avoid doing that with you.
And wow. This chapter wasn't at all what I was expecting. I thought Balin would go back for his clothes and find Logan camping out in Brett's room. Which might be happening. I don't know. I like that about first person narration. The not knowing bit.
Sure, I figured out Balin was not the one cuddling, because there is always trouble when a character doesn't open their eyes before smexing up folks in their bed, but even with the wilderness descriptions, I was surprised. More so because I'd put Soren in a little box marked 'Not Smutable'. And not because angry warrior elves aren't hot enough. (Okay, I admit, the smex factor there has nothing to do with being an elf. Rather, a lot of things are compensating for any pansy elf stereotypes that automatically get tacked on by using the word Elf.) I'd pegged Soren as some sort of disgruntled father of Balin, trying to find fault with his son's mate, and had to go back and reread some bits to clear up my confusion. Soren explained they all help raise the kids before they can have one of their own. Congrats Brett on fucking the babysitter of your mate (<-I couldn't find a decent card to send with this sentiment). Whether father or babysitter, plenty of shock value there. Besides, Soren was supposed to be off somewhere, spreading the word the Atlantean treaty was null and void. Not snuggling the sad Earthling. Definitely not what Balin meant by keeping Brett company. There is a little kid in my head singsonging 'somebody's in trouble'. Another voice is pointing out Brett totally started it. Really dude, there was hair involved where there wasn't hair a scant few hours before. Suspect something.
But ultimately, Soren has been very naughty. Especially -when- he told Brett to open his eyes. Very very naughty. There is some psychological twistiness in how he operates. NOT COMPLAINING.
I might grumble if Soren orchestrated this just to piss off the human. That isn't playing fair. Or nice.
A little worried about the bite Soren gave him. Was it a mark? Will it help the virus spread? Kinda icky if this was orchestrated to troubleshoot the malfunctioning virus. Does Balin have any rights about who marks Brett? Shouldn't someone have given Brett a memo if he could be unwittingly marked?
So many questions. A sure sign someone is keeping me in that happy space between Entertained and In Suspense. Thank you!
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September 1, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Review Part 2 (because I didn't notice I'd overstretched the limit)
(<-I couldn't find a decent card to send with this sentiment). Whether father or babysitter, plenty of shock value there. Besides, Soren was supposed to be off somewhere, spreading the word the Atlantean treaty was null and void. Not snuggling the sad Earthling. Definitely not what Balin meant by keeping Brett company. There is a little kid in my head singsonging 'somebody's in trouble'. Another voice is pointing out Brett totally started it. Really dude, there was hair involved where there wasn't hair a scant few hours before. Suspect something.
But ultimately, Soren has been very naughty. Especially -when- he told Brett to open his eyes. Very very naughty. There is some psychological twistiness in how he operates. NOT COMPLAINING.
I might grumble if Soren orchestrated this just to piss off the human. That isn't playing fair. Or nice.
A little worried about the bite Soren gave him. Was it a mark? Will it help the virus spread? Kinda icky if this was orchestrated to troubleshoot the malfunctioning virus. Does Balin have any rights about who marks Brett? Shouldn't someone have given Brett a memo if he could be unwittingly marked?
So many questions. A sure sign someone is keeping me in that happy space between Entertained and In Suspense. Thank you!
(<-I couldn't find a decent card to send with this sentiment). Whether father or babysitter, plenty of shock value there. Besides, Soren was supposed to be off somewhere, spreading the word the Atlantean treaty was null and void. Not snuggling the sad Earthling. Definitely not what Balin meant by keeping Brett company. There is a little kid in my head singsonging 'somebody's in trouble'. Another voice is pointing out Brett totally started it. Really dude, there was hair involved where there wasn't hair a scant few hours before. Suspect something.
But ultimately, Soren has been very naughty. Especially -when- he told Brett to open his eyes. Very very naughty. There is some psychological twistiness in how he operates. NOT COMPLAINING.
I might grumble if Soren orchestrated this just to piss off the human. That isn't playing fair. Or nice.
A little worried about the bite Soren gave him. Was it a mark? Will it help the virus spread? Kinda icky if this was orchestrated to troubleshoot the malfunctioning virus. Does Balin have any rights about who marks Brett? Shouldn't someone have given Brett a memo if he could be unwittingly marked?
So many questions. A sure sign someone is keeping me in that happy space between Entertained and In Suspense. Thank you!
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September 1, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Nooo !
I just don't understand why Soren did that !! T.T
I just don't understand why Soren did that !! T.T