schedule
May 14, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Oh man, it's never good to be interrupted by your parent(s)!
I don't think you're pushing the character too far, it seems like a natural progression (kinda glad no-one can accidentally share my dreams though! :D ).
I don't think you're pushing the character too far, it seems like a natural progression (kinda glad no-one can accidentally share my dreams though! :D ).
schedule
May 13, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Hello, hello. Yes, it's me, back again reporting live from the scariest place imaginable... the inside of my head! Just kidding. Anyway, I am shocked and proud that my review, actually got a response review. That has never happened to me before... in fact, how many times HAS that actually happened at all on this site? Mind-boggling...
And just for future reference, I too never went to my prom (partially WHY I wouldn't be the one to take you) and I am, in fact, a guy.
DUN DUN DUN!!! *Studio Audience Gasps!* Shocking, I know. Also shocking is that I don't have much of an ego as is considered the common stereotype about most males. But I will admit I felt a bit of male pride knowing I can give the author a nosebleed.
But I will not stop the advertising! No matter what the scars on my back tell me!
But enough randomness and responses, time for the review section. My much cooler-looking inner self is here with the updates. Inner me?
Inner-Snidne: Thanks outer me. Chapter 23 was definately a tender moment of abolute 'awww' moments as Shuey and Jerrik take the next step in pushing their relationship further. Poor Jerrik, Shuey taking his offer to 'sleep' with him a bit too literally. The 'I covet you' moment REALLY tied it in to how their relationship works out. In fact, I can't imagine them saying anything like 'I love you' to each other until the end, or even never... but each of them knowing by that time what the feeling was and the lack of needing to actually say it.
Although, I do admit that the beginning of Chapter 24 took on the mature tones that make both mes retract my previous review of 'Really HOT moments'. That was much, Much, MUCH, hotter and damn if it didn't give me an erection. Right outer me?
Outer-Snidne: Oh YEAH! *gives two thumbs up*
Inner-Snidne: Back to reality... yes, nothing says unrelenting sexual frustration then 'dreaming' about seeing someone jerk-off to the mere thought of you, then be almost taken by them completely. Except perhaps a quarter of the way to ACTUALLY doing the act only to be interrupted by your father. THAT is an awkward conversation that speaks for itself. Made even more awkward by the fact that Shuey had Dare with her at the time. Seriously, where the FUCK was she hiding it!?
Needless to say, Leon is going to have a FIELD-DAY grilling Jerrik about this. He must have really great timing... or really bad timing if you take Jerrik and Shuey's points of view.
And to avoid further questions, and suspicions of me being crazy, I will explain the two halves that make me! Outer me is often seen as a dark-haired, brown-eyed quiet, almost shy person. He's very wary around people he doesn't know, but you couldn't ask for a better friend or more compassionate person once you do get to know him.
Outer-Snidne: And inner me is personified with sapphire-colored, spiked up hair and crimson eyes. He tends to act cool and uncaring about everything and anyone. But he's friecely loyal to his friends and works hard to be there for them when they need it. He tends to be alot more outgoing then myself, and over-thinks sometimes... you might need a little patience with him. Surprisingly, we are both equally preverted but as you could probably guess, we each have different methods of showing, or not showing, it.
*Both halves fuse together*
Ah, much better. Anyway, now that I'm back to being one person, here's hoping you keep up the good writing. Now, I need a new gimmik to sell for of those Hybrids! They're flying off the shelves! Huh? Interesting... I never noticed that strange, looming human-shaped shadow being cast over me looking as though it's holding a knife before... meh, it's probably nothing.
Snidne, out!
And just for future reference, I too never went to my prom (partially WHY I wouldn't be the one to take you) and I am, in fact, a guy.
DUN DUN DUN!!! *Studio Audience Gasps!* Shocking, I know. Also shocking is that I don't have much of an ego as is considered the common stereotype about most males. But I will admit I felt a bit of male pride knowing I can give the author a nosebleed.
But I will not stop the advertising! No matter what the scars on my back tell me!
But enough randomness and responses, time for the review section. My much cooler-looking inner self is here with the updates. Inner me?
Inner-Snidne: Thanks outer me. Chapter 23 was definately a tender moment of abolute 'awww' moments as Shuey and Jerrik take the next step in pushing their relationship further. Poor Jerrik, Shuey taking his offer to 'sleep' with him a bit too literally. The 'I covet you' moment REALLY tied it in to how their relationship works out. In fact, I can't imagine them saying anything like 'I love you' to each other until the end, or even never... but each of them knowing by that time what the feeling was and the lack of needing to actually say it.
Although, I do admit that the beginning of Chapter 24 took on the mature tones that make both mes retract my previous review of 'Really HOT moments'. That was much, Much, MUCH, hotter and damn if it didn't give me an erection. Right outer me?
Outer-Snidne: Oh YEAH! *gives two thumbs up*
Inner-Snidne: Back to reality... yes, nothing says unrelenting sexual frustration then 'dreaming' about seeing someone jerk-off to the mere thought of you, then be almost taken by them completely. Except perhaps a quarter of the way to ACTUALLY doing the act only to be interrupted by your father. THAT is an awkward conversation that speaks for itself. Made even more awkward by the fact that Shuey had Dare with her at the time. Seriously, where the FUCK was she hiding it!?
Needless to say, Leon is going to have a FIELD-DAY grilling Jerrik about this. He must have really great timing... or really bad timing if you take Jerrik and Shuey's points of view.
And to avoid further questions, and suspicions of me being crazy, I will explain the two halves that make me! Outer me is often seen as a dark-haired, brown-eyed quiet, almost shy person. He's very wary around people he doesn't know, but you couldn't ask for a better friend or more compassionate person once you do get to know him.
Outer-Snidne: And inner me is personified with sapphire-colored, spiked up hair and crimson eyes. He tends to act cool and uncaring about everything and anyone. But he's friecely loyal to his friends and works hard to be there for them when they need it. He tends to be alot more outgoing then myself, and over-thinks sometimes... you might need a little patience with him. Surprisingly, we are both equally preverted but as you could probably guess, we each have different methods of showing, or not showing, it.
*Both halves fuse together*
Ah, much better. Anyway, now that I'm back to being one person, here's hoping you keep up the good writing. Now, I need a new gimmik to sell for of those Hybrids! They're flying off the shelves! Huh? Interesting... I never noticed that strange, looming human-shaped shadow being cast over me looking as though it's holding a knife before... meh, it's probably nothing.
Snidne, out!
schedule
May 7, 2008 at 12:00 AM
i love this! they are really such a cute couple! :P
schedule
May 6, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Aww, kitties! I do appreciate the fact that you are making Shuey's development in the world realistic; not suddenly going from clueless about emotions to sobbing and beaming the next day. I also like the mate development. Email me about the beta stuff, now that I'm out of school, I need to make a writing/beta schedule, lol.
schedule
May 6, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I like covet, it sounds sweet :) (and yay, kitties! :)
schedule
April 30, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Let me get this straight... I make you quote "Blush like a school-girl with a crush" unquote. Then I must be doing something right then, and this next review will probably make you feel like that one fantasy where the hottest, coolest guy in school just asked you out to the prom or something... By the way, that guy would not have been me. XD
Anyway, these last two chapters have been quite the thrilling ones. Chapter 21 can be best described in the following 4 words:
THAT. WAS. FREAKIN. HOT.
You can almost feel the pent-up sexual frustration building in the room, threatening to tear them both apart with the burning desire to sate the flames that even now threaten to sear them from the inside out... although poor Shuey doesn't really get what it means yet, I have a feeling it won't be long now...
Chapter 22, however, brought us back to the well defined, happy-go-stabbing character that made us like Shuey in the first place. Even more new powers to have to control, to which I'm sure she only sees as more of a burden during her training. Although I could imagine that considering Leon's idea of her being 'mated' to Jerrik, she would have a hard time consentrating on what she's learning, stab someone in the arm, most likely the first person that got within her range, and blame her lack of focus on Jerrik, his mouth, his tongue, his physique, and everything else about him that she finds attractive but is too emotionally stunted in her growth to recognize properly what it is and why, thus most likely blaming Jerrik again for that too.
Damn, that was a long sentence.
Here's hoping you keep this up.
Snidne, out.
((This review sponsered by the makers of the Female Demon/Angel Hybrid model. Now with new weather-controlling powers and retractable wings, plus an all new 30% less death rate! Buy 4 now! Right now! Why are you still reading this? Buy it! Buy it now!!!))
Anyway, these last two chapters have been quite the thrilling ones. Chapter 21 can be best described in the following 4 words:
THAT. WAS. FREAKIN. HOT.
You can almost feel the pent-up sexual frustration building in the room, threatening to tear them both apart with the burning desire to sate the flames that even now threaten to sear them from the inside out... although poor Shuey doesn't really get what it means yet, I have a feeling it won't be long now...
Chapter 22, however, brought us back to the well defined, happy-go-stabbing character that made us like Shuey in the first place. Even more new powers to have to control, to which I'm sure she only sees as more of a burden during her training. Although I could imagine that considering Leon's idea of her being 'mated' to Jerrik, she would have a hard time consentrating on what she's learning, stab someone in the arm, most likely the first person that got within her range, and blame her lack of focus on Jerrik, his mouth, his tongue, his physique, and everything else about him that she finds attractive but is too emotionally stunted in her growth to recognize properly what it is and why, thus most likely blaming Jerrik again for that too.
Damn, that was a long sentence.
Here's hoping you keep this up.
Snidne, out.
((This review sponsered by the makers of the Female Demon/Angel Hybrid model. Now with new weather-controlling powers and retractable wings, plus an all new 30% less death rate! Buy 4 now! Right now! Why are you still reading this? Buy it! Buy it now!!!))
schedule
April 30, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Heh, exactly how long is Seji going to be frozen to the roof for? (oh, the humiliation! ;)
I get the feeling someone is going to have to give Shuey the 'birds and the bees' talk fairly soon as well :D
I get the feeling someone is going to have to give Shuey the 'birds and the bees' talk fairly soon as well :D
schedule
April 30, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Oh, and I've got to say, lol at Snidne for the advertorial! :)
schedule
April 22, 2008 at 12:00 AM
:D
schedule
April 22, 2008 at 12:00 AM
aha! i love it! i think they're relationship is progressing nicely; who knows? mau=ybe shuey will actually atart acting 'normal'...lol! great chapter & overall story! i can't wait for more!