rate_review Reviews

May I say this story is just fantastic! I love the plot, characters, and story line thus far. I think your story could easily be made into a novel IMO. The only suggestions I have if you ever decide to do a complete re-write is to make the chapters flow together a little more. It jumps a lot, and sometimes I can't tell if the next chapter is the same day or later in the week. Also the only real errors I've seen is Angel vs Angle. VERY easy to mix up and spell check won't catch it. Besides that, your story is beyond great. I found it 3 days ago and every time I've gotten a chance to read it, I have. Nothing is better then looking at the time (9:30pm) then again what you perceive to be a few minuets, only to find out an hour or so went by (11pm). Only good stories catch me like that. I can't WAIT for the next chapters!!!

I don't normally review stories. But I like this one so much I had to. I can't wait for the next chapter. Theres nothing about this story I don't love.

woot! that was a very well written sex scene, this as well as the first. i love this story!!!

that was awesome! is jerrick ever going to know that she didnt leave him on purpose? that she didnt try to break their bond? woo. drama! i love it. update soon please.

i just finished the first chapter and i love stories like this, i like where your going and cant wait to read the following chapters. thank you so much for writing this kind of story! **hugs**

Man, that Brethmel's a sadistic bastard! (I suppose I should have got that from the whole 'demon' thing, but still :)

(and I thought it was cute that Shuey's mist likes having it's tummy rubbed too :D )

-Due to mathamatical errors involved in the last review, it was cut short. Tis what I get for trying to calculate things about Shuey. We apologize for any inconvience

Signed,
Snidne, President of Angelic Evil Inc.-

Argh! You're evil! What did she say!?!?! :P

Nothing wrong with a bit of healthy computer game addiction (excuse me, have to go play World of Warcraft now ;)

-Due to lawsuits, damaged production lines, and the development of the new Shuey V4.0, Jerrik V2.0, and Leon V2.0 Life-sized Models, this ad has been suspended. We profusely apologize to the remaining living people who have purchased our products. We now direct you to our previously scheduled review.

Signed:
Snidne, President of Angelic Evil Inc.-

Freakin, wow. Shuey's bond with Jerrik was threatened with some dire consequences. Could this tactic be used again? Maybe, maybe not but I do hope so! And let's not forget Shuey's parents meeting up again... I have a feeling this is one of those fights that WON'T end in fantastic, mind-blowing make-up sex.

Of course, you have given great sex in your latest chapter, so that makes up for it. Shuey re-evaluating her self-worth which probably doesn't look well considering how she was raised and who her parents are... Though I do love the lovely moment she and Jerrik have. Jerrik makes Shuey feel like she belongs. Which is just as well.

....
..........
..I can't take it! I must calculate what Shuey believes her own self-worth is!

True Equations:
1 1 = Lowest worth (A slug has more meaning then I do...)
100 = Greatest worth (Only God could be badder then me!

Self Worth = 101 - Parental Factors (Max value = 50) - Nature (Max value = 25) - Nurture (Max value = 25) + Outside influences (Max value = ??)
Parental Factors: Demon Father who dispises her, Angelic mother who wants to use her.
Parental Factors = 75 (error)
Nature: Secluded, guarded feelings. Tends to stab people, glare, or act rude to get them away. Emotionally unstable/clueless.
Nature = 60 (error)
Nurture: Raised to believe she is worthless and would be killed on sight. Openly dispised by her guardian. Never had real friends thoughout most of her childhood.
Nurture = 80 (Error)
Outside Influences: Is loved by Jerrik. Mated to Jerrik. Is seen as a sister by Leon.
Outside Influences = 645 (?????)

101 - 75 - 60 - 80 + 645 = Shuey's Self Worth. (1 Error... Error... Error... Error...


...Once again, it's imposible. Oh well! Before my computer crashes from lack of being able to process this info, I'm gone!

Snidne, out!

It's been a while, but I was really pleased with what I got to read. I'm so glad the relationship between Jerrick and Shuey has finally taken flight. You do an incredible job with her heart versus her mind versus her confusion of heart and mind. It sounds complicated, and for Shuey it is, but also not really. I can't really explain it, but the writing and the emotions are great.

I personally don't think your sex scene was bad at all. Quite the opposite. It was hot and emotional in a way and I enjoyed it. You're quite the tease as well at times, with that dream and having them interupted and all that. Very well done.

Shuey's capture had me on the edge of my seat. And when she was nearly claimed? A little twinge of unease there.

I like reading about her power as well. The mist is pretty cool. I enjoy that.

And the little tidbit about Clara and Demon was interesting.

Jerrick's birthday, as I have mentioned was hot and great. All in all this story is just really well written.

I can't wait to see another update. Keep up the great work and I'll keep up the interested reading and long-winded reviews. LOL

Luinil