rate_review Reviews

Review for chapter 24

Okay, so you're mean! You killed all those poor people and you won't tell us anything about Leoff and Vas! *stomps feet* Not faaaaaaiiiiiiir! *sobs*

*laughing*

Oh my. This chapter is beautiful. Sorry I didn't review it sooner but I've been in England and didn't have net access for the last few days.

I really can't say much about the chappie except, bad bad people and naughty naughty Darcia. They really need to get it on again. I mean honestly, Di, come on! *laughs* Please?

And Leoff? Obey? Yeah right.

Please post more soon. Loves you and this story!

*hugs tight*

Luinil
ficchantress1218@gmail.com

Oh, and if you don't mind, can I promote this in the forum? People need to read it. No no, don't argue. They NEED to read it. Not should, not must, but need. *smiles*

Oh please please please! You wicked wicked authoress! You cliffied! You Cliffied! No fair! Please post the next chapter soon! I can't wait to see what happens! I hope Dean gives just as good as she gets. She needs to throw some stuff into his face. After all, Vesbitch... ahem... i mean, Vespa attacked her first! *growls* I hope that biotch gets what's coming to her!

Poor Leoff! I hope his ears weren't too damaged by the terrible singing :) Love how this one is going :)

*heaves a happy sigh* another wonderful tension packed chapter, with sensual core and calm finish.

Can't wait what you have cooked up with Leoff and Vas :) I love non-cliche story twists.
But I am also curious about Daen and Darcia, since Daen is close with Leoff... ohhh sweet blissful tension!

Can only repeat it - your style is wonderful! Your sentences flow and carry a wonderful melody. Even the choice of words is great.
Honestly, I could learn a lot from you :)

I feel honored that you still read chapter 9 of my story after such a long journey! Made me really blush and grin :) Thank you
I am currently working on chapter 10 and 11... and I tell you, it's a hard part not to drop into a typical cliche!
But no clue yet when they will be done and if I can post them at the same time. Since I am not native English speaking, I keep
finding tons of German grammar issues intermixed with english grammar and thought-flow-errors.

Happy Writing
Kynrael
PS: I adore your Darcia for being who and what he is!

Ok, I have been reading this story from the start and it's just wonderfull. However, I do have some questions.

Firstly, if Daen's family banished her and then tried to kill her - why is Leoff still standing by her. Won't they start trying to kill him to. It seems like they were apart for a long time, yet he instantly started to get money to get her out of jail and broke into Darcia house to get her out. Which makes it seem as if they are really close. However, Daen tried to see him once (and almost got raped), but she hasn't tried since. She hasn't even thought of her brother, who has not only been injured several times, but almost died. Why doesn't she feel him or try to get to him. At lest to help him with his sword, that would protect him - right?

Then there's Gaius Edouard's grudge against Darcia's family. This was explained in chapter 18 the fourth paragraph from the bottom, but I found this paragraph very confusing. Did Darcia's family steal land from Edouard's family or did Edouard's family steal land from Darcia's family? Also, did Gaius love Darcia mother (Lady Cyrus), but she married Darica's father instead? There is something about her being cast off by a man - not sure if it is Darcia's father or Gaius - but this is what sent her mad? I thought it was because she had the gift of sight and all the spirt voices mad her go mad. Does Gaius have it wrong or do I?

Lastly, there is Leoff and Vas. I am completely begging here - PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEEEEESSSSEE!!!! DO NOT MAKE LEOFF GAY!!!!
Now I'm not into M/M or F/F, but some stories I read have gay and/or lesbian characters which were really good. It fit the story and the characters involved. However, this is not the case here. From the very start - from everything I have read - Leoff's character is that of a hetero male. If Leoff's character had been gay he would have never been so easily turned on by Sienna Edouard. In chapter 16, when she took his virinity for the first time - you wrote - "HE FELT USED". A Gay man would have felt raped. In chapter 18, when Leoff is mad at himself for getting turned on by Sienna - you wrote - "brushing past an attactive maid in an inn was enough to give him a hard on". There is no way Leoff would get aroused by a maid if he were gay. Gay men are not turned on by women, they can not be aroused by women at all, even if he is a virgin - if he were gay he would only get turned on by men. Unless your making him bisexually - then that's completely different.

On the other hand, from the very start - from everthing I have read - Vas' character IS gay. When he didn't ask Leoff for any payment for fixing his amour - I felt Vas was gay. He even tells Leoff that he loves him - which I felt meant more like - I love you - and not - I love you like a brother. Also, Vas cried when Leoff tells him about Sienna, because to Vas - Leoff got raped. To Vas, who IS gay, it would seem like rape.

Also, I am a little disappointed - I was looking forward to seeing how Leoff handled Vas. I mean Leoff is not physically or emotionally open - he is very closed in. It seems Vas was the only person to ever get close to him - and not be a family member, of course. Leoff was actually accepting Vas and his friendship. I was looking forward to seeing how Leoff would accept Vas being gay. I was looking forward to seeing how you would write something like that - since that something I haven't really seen. A hetero man being close to a gay man. I really hope you don't fall into the usual thing of when two men get close they must be gay, so they have to fall in love.

Well, I hope I gave a different point of view and no matter what - I look forward to your next update.

Oo! Vas and Leoff are totally falling for one another aren't they! Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease!

*squeals*

And I love the... not twist, but the situation between Vivi and Vespa! I still don't like her but I can understand her better now. Unrequited love and then comp is enough to make even the most docile-tempered girl go insane and Vespa doesn't seem like she was that to begin with. Not insane, docile I mean. *laughs sheepishly*

Please tell me poor Vi isn't gonna be lonely forever and Vespa will finally figure out she loves him and quit picking on Dean? Please? *puppy eyes*

And if Leoff and Vas don't kiss soon I'm gonna admit myself to the mental ward! THEY! MUST! KISS! GRRRRRRR!!!! *laughs*

Keep up the amazing work my dear authoress because this is a story worth the bestseller's list. You'll be there one day if you want it and I'll be there too, supporting you and cheering you on. *hugs*

Love Luinil
ficchantress1218@gmail.com

Hmm nice background information.
I really love the way you embedded all this in your story.

Let's hope Vespa doesn't get her hands on Dean.

If Leoff and Vas are about to become more than just good friends, they will be the first and only M&M couple I actually would read about willingly.
They appear to me realistic and not like dumb pretty-boys :-) good one.

YOU. ARE. FREAKING. INCREDIBLE!

Okay, let's take stock here. Bloody brilliant? No. Freaking amazing? Not at all. Fan-freaking-tastic? HELL YES!!!!

I can't tell you how much I love this story. It is everything I think romance should be. You're easing into it and that's how it's supposed to be. And it's not all romance either. You've got suspense growing there as well.

I find Sienna is hilarious. She's a spoiled little brat who is in actuality just a very pretty three-year-old. And Dean! Jesus Christ that scene was hot! *fans self* Poor Darcia. She's driving him mad.

And what's up with the demon? He's too interested, you're right. He'd better not hurt her or Darcia's gonna kill him.

Wait, can demon blades be killed? Can their masters undo their pacts? *frowns* Oh well.

Please update soon! I lalalalawv this story!

*jumps into Darcia's arms and gets swung around and around*
*giggles*
Love Luinil
ficchantress1218@gmail.com
Oh, have I mentioned that you're brilliant?

Christmas finally over again and time to read :)

Chapter 22 is so full of tension, sensual moments and humor - it was simply beautiful to read!
I also love how smooth your story reads, and how detailed everything is.

I hope Daen will say one day those words to Darcia :-) they make a fine couple in my opinion, and he appears to be really fond of her.

Poor Leoff. I wonder why Sienna is so obsessed with him :D

Oh btw. I like mulled wine, too :-) During winter time I use to do that with the left over wine since I can't drink wine pure without food to it.

Oblivion:
One day the computer gaming industry will understand that computer "games" are not ONLY for weeeee children and that adults shouldn't be told what they can see and what not.
Oh well, let's hope and have some mulled wine

I like how this one is going, though I've got to wonder what Bherith is up to :) (though I think it's 'mulled' wine, not 'mould' wine ;)