schedule
October 16, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Aw i LOVED this!!! I wish it was mor than 1 chapter, plz continue it!!!
schedule
November 24, 2007 at 12:00 AM
i like it
schedule
November 16, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Hi Hysterical Woman,
I really liked this chapter, very nicely flowing and fresh. The journal idea is working and I like how he is explaining things away to himself. Well done. The only thing I'd like to change would be just a bit more on descriptions of main characters and body proportions. Bobby was able to carry the doll in his arms; on another hand, Bobby could be exeptionally well built for his work. Double-spacing paragraths would make it look very nice as well. Overall, this could be a beginning of a cool story :)
I really liked this chapter, very nicely flowing and fresh. The journal idea is working and I like how he is explaining things away to himself. Well done. The only thing I'd like to change would be just a bit more on descriptions of main characters and body proportions. Bobby was able to carry the doll in his arms; on another hand, Bobby could be exeptionally well built for his work. Double-spacing paragraths would make it look very nice as well. Overall, this could be a beginning of a cool story :)