rate_review Reviews

I love it but it's missing the something. I really don't know what the characters really look like. So I can't get into the story. Everything is good about it but to truly write a good story. You have to give a description about the character or how would you be able to picture them for when you are able to picture them in your mind you truly feel like you had lived it or seen it. That is how you make a good story. Believe I love to read and when you can picture the characters you can come to an understand and know and see how everything they go through and the sweet but sometime non so sweet moments happen. I still love it but I would love to see something like that but you still did good work. Your story is the best I have read so far on this site.

Oh my! I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. I do hope she recovers from this. Regardless, my thoughts and best wishes go with you.

I’m so sorry to hear about your grandmother Cara. I hope she will be all right. Take care.

Hopefully Bea can get her father to stop being the abusive butt-head that he has become. I hope Sarah doesn't kill herself. It would be a waste and really hurt her brother. I'm glad Crowely's still alive. I hope him and Bea stay together, but I foresee a nasty problem from that demon fellow. Keep writing and I'll keep reading.

Yea! I’m so happy you updated!!

I thought that was a neat trick you did with Sarah appearing on the curtain and then changing. That’s great that you show Sarah’s good side as well as the other. Most authors would have just made her an evil bitch, but you gave her a heart. Your story really has a tragic vein running through it, showing that most of these people are all just a victim of circumstance.

Again I am impressed with your description: “She knelt by the grave and placed a single dandelion on the dirt, her hands trembling. She looked up at the sky and let out a grief-stricken wail, her shoulders shuddering with the force of her weeping.” It’s like you paint a picture, which materializes in my mind.

I thought you did a nice job with the confrontation with Sarah. It certainly wasn’t what I was expecting. You have a way of making all your characters, including Bea, have both good and bad traits, which makes them much more interesting and well rounded. I mean nobody is all evil or all angelic. Therefore, it goes back to my belief that the neighborhood is an allegory for hell. And because of that, does anybody really deserve the horrible punishment of getting their soul sucked up by the malevolent Mr. Esser Von Seelen. This really is a thought-provoking story. Wow! Of course I could be wrong. I still have no idea what you have in mind, but I don’t believe this is some simple story.

Now I want Bea to hurry up and find Crawley to make sure he is okay. So many bad things can happen in your “neighborhood! It makes me worried. So please update soon!!

Awww, that was sooo good! Great chapter, update soon please!!!

@ 9 cool chapter update soon

*DB*

Wow! This was a dramatic chapter! I always think you have a real knack for description. I couldn’t get the vision of white walls with bleeding stains out of my head. And all those torture devices, it really sounds like a chamber of horrors. Again I think the neighborhood is an allegory for hell, but I know I may be wrong.

There was a lot of action in this chapter too. Bea really kicks ass. I was a little confused sometimes with some of the action, but I definitely got the gist of everything so I don’t think it mattered. I am happy that Crowley is still alive! Yay! And tell Bea not to stew over what happened. Its not murder if it is self-defense.

So they sell souls for narcotics. That’s pretty sad. And his Majesty isn’t the Devil, he is just a demon. Very interesting! I’m curious what Sarah will have to say to defend herself. What an exciting chapter!! Great Job!!

Wow, now that was a cool chapter. Beatrice is way more stronger than she gives herself credit for. I was totally shocked, I really didn't think it was a real gun. This stroy gets more interesting with every chapter. I'm looking forward to her little talk with Crowley's sister.

this chapter would have to be my favorite out of all the chapters because Beatrice finally kicks ass(literally)!!!