rate_review Reviews

Great sex scenes. The story moveth satisfactorily. There are very few grammar and spelling problems, so relax and write. Can't wait to see more.

The plot thickens! The story is getting better and better. I wish you would write faster! Anyhow, I must say I am enjoying this immensley. Your character deevelopments are coming along nicely. As for criticisms in regards to grammar and syntax, you will improve as you go along. After all practice makes perfect! You are off to a good start. Keep on writing and let nothing or no one deter you!

Hello,

still love your story very much! Oh and I didn't mean Jos' outfit when watching Max - I mean his... style when he remembered that he should have fed the boys :D

Oh and when you would move/copy this story to the slash subcategory I am sure you would receive more reviews - and I know you deserve it!

Greetings
Nathaniel

Please, please, please do not despair. I am one of those who absolutely love your story and would very much love for it to continue. The plot is extremely interesting and you manage to switch from scene to scene pretty well. And very few grammar errors too! Write, write, write! I can't wait to see what happens next!

Keep it coming!

Hello there :-)

Very nice progress of the story! Seems it turns into a real novel with lot of plot and such! I enjoy it very much at the moment even without sex scenes (also at the moment I hope :D). The bickering between Taylor and Elijah was really entertaining and I think I myself would have stared like Max did ;-)
And Jos is a cool character though his clothings are little bit out... Perhaps a little bit too much? Weirdo! XD

At this moment I don't really have a favourite char, though Taylor seems he could become it... We'll see :-)

Oh and in Chapter 5 you once wrote Elijah Wood - and 3 line above you wrote Elijah Steele. Intent or Freudian slip? :D

Okay I hope the few (way too few actually) reviews you get can keep you writing!
Nathaniel

So far the story is coming along nicely. As for grammar and spelling e.t.c., look to that at a later time. The premise of the story is great. Also, keep in mind that the story has just begun. I hope that this is the start of a long series! Every writer has to start somewhere and you have made a good beginning. The only beef I have with your story is that you do-not write fast enough! I eagerly await your next installment! Regards.

So far so good. Keep the chapters coming!

Hello there,

did I really ask for sex in every chapter? *looks at the former review* Huh, right... T'was a joke (not that I would complain anyway) and you are right - it doesn't fit in everything (this chapter for instance).

Good chapter by the way :-) The inner talking of Max reflects his character and perception of his surrounding and what's going on there very authentically. Well done!
Oh and for the top/bottom thingie: Reese and Max would make such a couple (if one could tell from the small knowledge we have at this moment and if they are going to get together, that is) but I think Elijah and Tae would not :-) Anyway, it's your story...

Keep writing and I hope you get more reviews soon!
Nathaniel

So far so good!