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April 12, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Cute chapter. Short but sweet. As before I like the byplay between Rennie and Melina. Though I can't honestly say that I know where this story is heading, I get the feeling it'll be well-handled when it gets there, if you know what I mean.
Thus Spoke Kaiser
Thus Spoke Kaiser
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April 12, 2007 at 12:00 AM
VERY nice! Rennie is even more complicated and intricate than I thought she was. She's caught in a web but is so deeply confused by her own feelings that she can't wrestle her way out of it. I like that. And the sex scene was pretty good too, especially if it was your first shot at it. I am very much enjoying your work.
Thus Spoke Kaiser
Thus Spoke Kaiser
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April 12, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Ah, chapter six has to be my fav chapter of all. A new (albeit nerdy) player has been brought into the mix, Melina actually seems jealous, both windows for character conflict. I'm loving this. Though I have to wonder why I don't feel sorry for this 'Peyton' kid. He is an innocent party and I can kinda see that he's gonna get hurt, meh... guess I'm just a heartless motherfucker when it comes to Femslash.
Keep up the good work.
Thus Spoke Kaiser
Keep up the good work.
Thus Spoke Kaiser
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March 7, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Wow... I like. I like alot.
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February 26, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Awesome. Well done.
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February 23, 2007 at 12:00 AM
You know, the way you wrote this scene didn't seem inexperienced at all. The way you expressed Rennie's utter disgust at Melina and at herself for what she was doing seemed very real to me. I was impressed.
Continue on with your story. Keep up the good work!
Continue on with your story. Keep up the good work!
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January 17, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Wow. I'm impressed. I read all four chapters in one sweep.
I love how you've let your characters develop, and how you've written them in such a way that they lead something like double lives. You have a very strong grasp of character as well as a gift for expression. I'm really impressed.
This story is superb. Excellent job, and keep up the good work!
I love how you've let your characters develop, and how you've written them in such a way that they lead something like double lives. You have a very strong grasp of character as well as a gift for expression. I'm really impressed.
This story is superb. Excellent job, and keep up the good work!
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January 8, 2007 at 12:00 AM
I love this story! I hope you're gonna keep it up because it's really good... and I cannot wait to read the next chapter^^
Val
Val
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December 28, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I like it so far! Keep writing!
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December 27, 2006 at 12:00 AM
This is very promising! I love the premise of it, plus it's very engaging to read. Write more soon!