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December 23, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Hello!
I really like it. I'm eager to know what happened to Caled and if there is a future in this world for him. Your style is appealing and nice to read :-)
Two things confuse me.
First thing is the different forms Caleb can transform into. There is a "invisible" form, a "grey" form (is this the blank form?), the white form and the "colored" form, right? Except from the "invisible" form Eric can see Caleb in every form. And you wrote that the "invisible" form needs concentration. So how comes it, that Eric can't see Caleb when he is in his blank form - or asked the other way around: Why does Caled has to concentrate to be seen by Eric?
Second: Why do you choose write you paragraphs in such a narrow space? I think it's more comfortable if you let the reader decide how wide they want the story to be diplayed. But that is only a small thing...
Anyway, please don't stop writing!
Nathaniel
I really like it. I'm eager to know what happened to Caled and if there is a future in this world for him. Your style is appealing and nice to read :-)
Two things confuse me.
First thing is the different forms Caleb can transform into. There is a "invisible" form, a "grey" form (is this the blank form?), the white form and the "colored" form, right? Except from the "invisible" form Eric can see Caleb in every form. And you wrote that the "invisible" form needs concentration. So how comes it, that Eric can't see Caleb when he is in his blank form - or asked the other way around: Why does Caled has to concentrate to be seen by Eric?
Second: Why do you choose write you paragraphs in such a narrow space? I think it's more comfortable if you let the reader decide how wide they want the story to be diplayed. But that is only a small thing...
Anyway, please don't stop writing!
Nathaniel
schedule
December 23, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Wow, I'm really curious about this 'him'. Is he the one forcing Caleb to stay there or something? I can't wait until Eric figures out more ... and poor guy, doesn't realize Caleb is floating around with him.
schedule
December 23, 2006 at 12:00 AM
this is still by far my favorite story. i'm glad that eric was able to help caleb. i love your story but i wish you could make the chapters longer because i'm so disappointed when i finish reading one. i hope u update soon and tell us more about caleb and what happened to him.PS- i hate aunt sally. she's such a bitch and i'm surprised that pete can stand her.anyway, update soon.
schedule
December 23, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Aww this is so good! I'm so hooked! I love your long chapters, and you describe things so well, I can really see everything perfectly like a movie. So far this story is really interesting and I hope you update very soon! Pretty please?
schedule
December 20, 2006 at 12:00 AM
oh on!!! *scared*
i hope Eric can do something....
& i hope u update quickly!!!! *bites lip*
i hope Eric can do something....
& i hope u update quickly!!!! *bites lip*
schedule
December 18, 2006 at 12:00 AM
ACK! CALEB! NOOO!!! ERIC HAS TO SAVE HIM!*sniffles*
I'm curious...how is Caleb related to the house/the people who lived in it? I'm DYING to know!
Haha. I made a funny.
I'm curious...how is Caleb related to the house/the people who lived in it? I'm DYING to know!
Haha. I made a funny.
schedule
December 18, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Oh my gawd this is amazing please update soon and I'm so adding you on MSN later.
~C
~C
schedule
December 18, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Another great chapter! The only thing is the aunt's name is it Sally, like before, or Sarah, like now?
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December 17, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I'm desperate for an update on this!
schedule
December 17, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Ah, scary! I could see this as a horror movie xD