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schedule
September 25, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Sorry bout that ^^; read a bit to fast. But still great chapter ^^ can't wait to see what happens next
schedule
May 18, 2007 at 12:00 AM
That's the last chapter T_T oh well...Great story, loved it!
schedule
April 18, 2007 at 12:00 AM
liked the chapter lots. can't wait for the real action to begin! hehehe
schedule
April 10, 2007 at 12:00 AM
But we love Alex. And Jodi. And Sage. Please say theres more... T__T I know Sage isnt primary, but what about him? lol he gets no vampiric action :P >.< Moooooorrreeee!!!
schedule
April 6, 2007 at 12:00 AM
So theres more, right? But anyways, I loved this chapter. it was interesting reading about Jodi's off the wall reactions to everyting. Such a chatacter she is. Great job! Cant wait for more if there is going to be.
schedule
March 21, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Wow! I'm only on chapter four, but I already want to jump and tell you I LOVE the way you write!
Everything so far, from characters, to phrasing is great. ok, so some spelling here and there could improve but... no one's perfect hahaha!
Starting from the top: Alex. An awesome character developing very well thus far. I love your initial representation of her; The red hoodie and green gloves are an excellent contrast to what one expects of a 'typical American Doctor'. This also adds vibrance to her personality, and matches just about everything else about her!
French.
Not too many people add in alternate languages in their stories. None that I've read so far anyways. Grammar is correct and accurate, but the wording almost sounds stiff. Then again, I'm a bit of a crank when it comes to French so don't be discouraged! A question I have for you is did you study Parisian French through immersion or Francophonie? I can also understand that it may very well be in Joel's/Felix's and Jodi's characters to speak French in a solidly translatable manner, the only hindrance would be that, should they have been in Paris for so long, would they not have developed some personal colloquialisms? Regardless, I'm glad to see this in the story as it presents realism to the situation; they are, after all, in France!
Multiple chapters!!
Anyone can write a one chapter fic'. Yours is much more developed which is very desirable for my reading style! Every chapter is carefully presented and planned adding to the elements of the entire story. You are adept at twisting emotions around your character's fingers as environment is well presented as well as the reasons behind the character's actions. We as readers can identify ourselves with the characters to some degree, whether its heartbreak, love, inner confusion or rambunctiousness that vivifies them!
I can understand that you're hard pressed for time. You're human too, after all :P
All in all, an excellent story... and I'm not even half way through! Consider perhaps turning this into something more? I'm definetly going to be looking up more of your work, but honestly, if its within your scope of desires, become a writer!
So a poop sandwich in short:
Excellent character descriptions
Imagery could use a little work
Well built situations and Thorough plot work!
<3 Lots of love, Kim
Everything so far, from characters, to phrasing is great. ok, so some spelling here and there could improve but... no one's perfect hahaha!
Starting from the top: Alex. An awesome character developing very well thus far. I love your initial representation of her; The red hoodie and green gloves are an excellent contrast to what one expects of a 'typical American Doctor'. This also adds vibrance to her personality, and matches just about everything else about her!
French.
Not too many people add in alternate languages in their stories. None that I've read so far anyways. Grammar is correct and accurate, but the wording almost sounds stiff. Then again, I'm a bit of a crank when it comes to French so don't be discouraged! A question I have for you is did you study Parisian French through immersion or Francophonie? I can also understand that it may very well be in Joel's/Felix's and Jodi's characters to speak French in a solidly translatable manner, the only hindrance would be that, should they have been in Paris for so long, would they not have developed some personal colloquialisms? Regardless, I'm glad to see this in the story as it presents realism to the situation; they are, after all, in France!
Multiple chapters!!
Anyone can write a one chapter fic'. Yours is much more developed which is very desirable for my reading style! Every chapter is carefully presented and planned adding to the elements of the entire story. You are adept at twisting emotions around your character's fingers as environment is well presented as well as the reasons behind the character's actions. We as readers can identify ourselves with the characters to some degree, whether its heartbreak, love, inner confusion or rambunctiousness that vivifies them!
I can understand that you're hard pressed for time. You're human too, after all :P
All in all, an excellent story... and I'm not even half way through! Consider perhaps turning this into something more? I'm definetly going to be looking up more of your work, but honestly, if its within your scope of desires, become a writer!
So a poop sandwich in short:
Excellent character descriptions
Imagery could use a little work
Well built situations and Thorough plot work!
<3 Lots of love, Kim
schedule
March 21, 2007 at 12:00 AM
<3 Another wicked chapter!
But... O-KAMI! I don't know what medical procedures are where you live, but... No self-respecting doctor would use Alcohol nowadays.
1 Hint: IT HURTS. as aptly described by Alex. ;) good call
2 It actually damages the skin cells and doesn't do a decent job of dis-infecting a wound. Neither does Hydrogen Peroxide.
lmao, just so you know, for personal use :P
Regardless, quite fitting!
Keep up the awesome work! I'm Reading on!
But... O-KAMI! I don't know what medical procedures are where you live, but... No self-respecting doctor would use Alcohol nowadays.
1 Hint: IT HURTS. as aptly described by Alex. ;) good call
2 It actually damages the skin cells and doesn't do a decent job of dis-infecting a wound. Neither does Hydrogen Peroxide.
lmao, just so you know, for personal use :P
Regardless, quite fitting!
Keep up the awesome work! I'm Reading on!
schedule
March 21, 2007 at 12:00 AM
/cry is over T____T
I clicked on the chapter bar at the bottom and seriously almost cried.
I would yell updateupdateupdate, but... hahaha that's not my style.
Yes, it was short but the chapter was sweet nonetheless! Riviting. I have 'almost ADD' and read this start to finish! Keep up the great work! Love for Vampires and of course, MGD!
*and i would sign in, but I'm too lazy... so for now, I'll leave this, but feel free to drop a line when you can. <3 beta proofing/proof reading as well ;)*
I clicked on the chapter bar at the bottom and seriously almost cried.
I would yell updateupdateupdate, but... hahaha that's not my style.
Yes, it was short but the chapter was sweet nonetheless! Riviting. I have 'almost ADD' and read this start to finish! Keep up the great work! Love for Vampires and of course, MGD!
*and i would sign in, but I'm too lazy... so for now, I'll leave this, but feel free to drop a line when you can. <3 beta proofing/proof reading as well ;)*
schedule
March 1, 2007 at 12:00 AM
bwahahaha *laughs amused* I love your comments (thank you for your kind words behind mine) to the reviewers at the end of the chapters *chuckles*
Anyway the turned her into a vamp! man I think she's going to freak out! Hell I would!
Another splendid chapter... I love this story *waves happyly to you*
Anyway the turned her into a vamp! man I think she's going to freak out! Hell I would!
Another splendid chapter... I love this story *waves happyly to you*
schedule
March 1, 2007 at 12:00 AM
awesome story! one of the best i have read lately