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August 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I like it! I like the contrasr between characters personalities, I don't mind the whole innocent girl meets bad boy thing. Most people do that in a stupid way and I can tell you won't. I like it and hope you continue with it.
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August 10, 2006 at 12:00 AM
OMG! ANOTHER TEENAGE HIGH SCHOOL STORY! AAAAAUUUUGGGGHHHH!
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August 10, 2006 at 12:00 AM
@2: "Okay, this chapter was rather uneventful….and LONG."
How come I found it WAY more interesting? That was hilarious.
How come I found it WAY more interesting? That was hilarious.
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August 8, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I mean HARD! Like the nipples on a blind lesbian while she’s making her way down a fish market hard!
hahahai loved that line- this is a good fic so far- if you type it up ill read it!!!
hahahai loved that line- this is a good fic so far- if you type it up ill read it!!!
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August 7, 2006 at 12:00 AM
one of my favorite fanfics, due to the fact that Monika is just so real with the way she (or someone else) deals with her little dilemmas. please update soon cause i'm dying to know what's gonna happen next!
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August 6, 2006 at 12:00 AM
This story is pretty good, I'm interested to see where you're going with it. Little to no spelling/grammatical errors which I think people should be bowing down to you for. It shows you actually put some effort into writing a decent piece of fiction, compared to half the shit on this wonderful website. I like the character development within the first two chapters. I dont like what a goody-goody the main girl is, but its your story. I just find her pissing me off a bit with her naivety :P But thats her character, and there is nothing wrong with it.
I'm really excited for the next chapter! Keep up the good work.
I'm really excited for the next chapter! Keep up the good work.
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June 26, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Not a bad first chapter so don't sell yourself short. The opening from Oz's POV is a little unsettling, especially because you fall into telling the story from the first person POV. How would she know what Oz did that morning? But, I can see where you can work that in and it wasn't as unsettling as it might have been.
Don't abandon this. It's a good start and I think it will get better with every chapter.
Don't abandon this. It's a good start and I think it will get better with every chapter.
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June 21, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Great story! I hope you update soon I love it. It's just like when I was at school Lol.
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June 20, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Great story! It's wonderfully writtent. Please do update sometime in the near future.
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June 19, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I love it.
It still clicks for cliche but in the kind that starts out like that and then branches off a million times.
Hmm.. I'm guesing who Monika ends up with... is it.... Mrs. Maple?! :P
Can't wait.
Ashleigh.
It still clicks for cliche but in the kind that starts out like that and then branches off a million times.
Hmm.. I'm guesing who Monika ends up with... is it.... Mrs. Maple?! :P
Can't wait.
Ashleigh.