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July 18, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Aw! Wonderful! I so totally actually want to read more on this story itself. Then again, I've completely fallen in love with Martel! He's so cool! haha
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June 22, 2008 at 12:00 AM
um a very good story. but are you sure with the end? to finish it just like that? i would love to read more about her life and what they did later. maybe sometime you could continue the story?
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December 25, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Yay, another Kanashii special! I will be starting Tender is the Night now. I will leave little reviews though, so you’ll know where I am as I go.
Now, it doesn’t surprise me one bit when you told me you have already published some of your erotica. You write so superb. In many ways you have influenced me quite a bit. I can see now what is missing from my own writing and if I could, I would go back and change some things about “Nomads,” believe me. :-) But oh well, this is all a learning curve right?
Anyway, as usual this story starts out at a breathtaking pace. Told completely from Ciara’s point of view, it is like you are with her the entire way, going through her interrogation and breakdown, feeling her pain.
Indeed this whole interrogation and breaking of her will is so brutal and grueling, it’s almost painful to read in some parts, of course I kept thinking back to the first Vendetta, which was really painful to read. (Eeeek!) Yet I have to say, it really makes for compelling reading. You certainly aren’t a slouch when it comes to describing bad things in horrific detail. It actually makes me cringe. Yet again, that is the excitement and grittiness of your stories. :D It just pulls me right in.
As before, I am fascinated by the masterful and coldly-controlling Laurence Martel. He really does just reek of money, danger, intelligence and power. You don’t even try to make him nice, you just let the character be who he is which actually is very cool. I mean it’s rare to read about a protagonist who has such questionable morals and a very bad dark side. It makes him very scary, yet strangely sexy. I have no doubt in my mind, what so ever, how Laurence came to be an Underboss. You not only tell us he’s a badass, you show us. Again excellent writing!
In conclusion, poor Ciara seems to be a classic case of Stockholm syndrome, but then again that just gives a realistic edge to your story. Gritty and dark, that’s your style, at least with your mafia stories. :D
So in conclusion, I do believe I enjoyed The Comare more than this story, simply because Diana was really kind of asking for trouble and poor Ciara was just a victim. Yet both stories are riveting and excellently told.
Wonderful writing Kanashii, as usual!
Now, it doesn’t surprise me one bit when you told me you have already published some of your erotica. You write so superb. In many ways you have influenced me quite a bit. I can see now what is missing from my own writing and if I could, I would go back and change some things about “Nomads,” believe me. :-) But oh well, this is all a learning curve right?
Anyway, as usual this story starts out at a breathtaking pace. Told completely from Ciara’s point of view, it is like you are with her the entire way, going through her interrogation and breakdown, feeling her pain.
Indeed this whole interrogation and breaking of her will is so brutal and grueling, it’s almost painful to read in some parts, of course I kept thinking back to the first Vendetta, which was really painful to read. (Eeeek!) Yet I have to say, it really makes for compelling reading. You certainly aren’t a slouch when it comes to describing bad things in horrific detail. It actually makes me cringe. Yet again, that is the excitement and grittiness of your stories. :D It just pulls me right in.
As before, I am fascinated by the masterful and coldly-controlling Laurence Martel. He really does just reek of money, danger, intelligence and power. You don’t even try to make him nice, you just let the character be who he is which actually is very cool. I mean it’s rare to read about a protagonist who has such questionable morals and a very bad dark side. It makes him very scary, yet strangely sexy. I have no doubt in my mind, what so ever, how Laurence came to be an Underboss. You not only tell us he’s a badass, you show us. Again excellent writing!
In conclusion, poor Ciara seems to be a classic case of Stockholm syndrome, but then again that just gives a realistic edge to your story. Gritty and dark, that’s your style, at least with your mafia stories. :D
So in conclusion, I do believe I enjoyed The Comare more than this story, simply because Diana was really kind of asking for trouble and poor Ciara was just a victim. Yet both stories are riveting and excellently told.
Wonderful writing Kanashii, as usual!
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March 5, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Your Canziano stuff is still some of my favorite stories, you know that don't you? That's a hint for you. Write some more!
KJoe
KJoe
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February 11, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Mitts
Oh boy....I am truly grateful your stories were recommended to me to read! I love them...although the material is sometimes a little graphic. But that to me just makes the story that much better, for how can you tell a convincing brutal story if you have to sugar coat it?
I'm off to read some more now...lol...
Keep up the good work...
Oh boy....I am truly grateful your stories were recommended to me to read! I love them...although the material is sometimes a little graphic. But that to me just makes the story that much better, for how can you tell a convincing brutal story if you have to sugar coat it?
I'm off to read some more now...lol...
Keep up the good work...
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November 19, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Ur mafia stuff really rocks. I love these stories on the Canzianos as well as your Soprano's fanfics. Yoou ever think of maybe doing some Godfather fanfics? As a guy I'm not into all this male slash stuff and that is all they have on the Godfather category. So if you evr want to think about doing some Godfather or Goodfellows fanfics that would be da bomb!
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November 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Please put some new Martello stories up soon. I am going through Laurence Martello withdrawl! ARRRRRRGH
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November 11, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I really liked seeing a nicer side of Gio near the end of this story. I always see him as this really loyal mob bodyguard who can be sadistic and very to the point but then there is this hidden side to him- like when he is in the room with her at the end- and caring for her as the shot takes effect.
I think Gio is kind of my favorite in your series even though we never see much of him or learn much of him. He is kind of a bit player, but he is in a lot of the stories. I would love to know more about what makes him tick, or anything about him. I have this love of really overly musclebound guys and Gio just is fascinating to read about. I don't know if you ever consider any of your reviews suggestions or wishes but I am hoping you put him in another story or write maybe a short story about him?
You seem like a really good author and seem well written and do great descriptions and dialogue of the characters and such. Thanks for taking my suggestion into consideration if you do a Gio Aprile story.
I think Gio is kind of my favorite in your series even though we never see much of him or learn much of him. He is kind of a bit player, but he is in a lot of the stories. I would love to know more about what makes him tick, or anything about him. I have this love of really overly musclebound guys and Gio just is fascinating to read about. I don't know if you ever consider any of your reviews suggestions or wishes but I am hoping you put him in another story or write maybe a short story about him?
You seem like a really good author and seem well written and do great descriptions and dialogue of the characters and such. Thanks for taking my suggestion into consideration if you do a Gio Aprile story.
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November 5, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Amazing story, I adore your literacy and realism.
But I am a critic, but fear not, I have little critcism for your talen -^^-
The only things I can point out is that you use exclaimation points in places they shouldn't be. Its a pet peeve of mine to see them out of dialog, but not only that you kinda put them in places where a period should have been.
Another concern was that I dislike how you have some profainity where there should not be. Mr.Martello and his sosphisticated follows are supposed to be held with elegance and grace as you depicted them - yet you have them use 'Pissed off' instead of a more proper 'Make Angry' which should have been used. There's times where it should have been used, and where it should not have been used.
In the heat of anger is when 'Pissed off' comes out, but when calm and collected is when 'Make me angry' should have been or some more astrocratic formation of the sentence. 'Pissed off' just seems a bit lewd for your highly held characters =3
Ciara also should be the one more lewd in her speech when she's being drilled, since she's supposed to be their 'pet' I supposed that she should have spoken more lowly instead of their high honored 'fancy talk'. Instead of her bland, almost emotionless 'Give me pleasure' it could have been a little more stepped up to something more desperate and... animalistic :P
I hope my advice gets to you, I truely love your stories! Please keep writing them, I can't wait for the next chapter!
But I am a critic, but fear not, I have little critcism for your talen -^^-
The only things I can point out is that you use exclaimation points in places they shouldn't be. Its a pet peeve of mine to see them out of dialog, but not only that you kinda put them in places where a period should have been.
Another concern was that I dislike how you have some profainity where there should not be. Mr.Martello and his sosphisticated follows are supposed to be held with elegance and grace as you depicted them - yet you have them use 'Pissed off' instead of a more proper 'Make Angry' which should have been used. There's times where it should have been used, and where it should not have been used.
In the heat of anger is when 'Pissed off' comes out, but when calm and collected is when 'Make me angry' should have been or some more astrocratic formation of the sentence. 'Pissed off' just seems a bit lewd for your highly held characters =3
Ciara also should be the one more lewd in her speech when she's being drilled, since she's supposed to be their 'pet' I supposed that she should have spoken more lowly instead of their high honored 'fancy talk'. Instead of her bland, almost emotionless 'Give me pleasure' it could have been a little more stepped up to something more desperate and... animalistic :P
I hope my advice gets to you, I truely love your stories! Please keep writing them, I can't wait for the next chapter!
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June 2, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Ok, well read my reviews on all your other Canziano stories. But I wanted to say your disclaimers are a hoot! \"I don\'t want no contracts on my head\" You got wit on you girl that is for sure. I\'m glad someone is doing mobster stuff, I notice there is not alot of mafia stuff on here, well I guess there is now. Time to do a new Canziano story, huh? (HINT)