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schedule
January 27, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I have to agree with the reviewer above. The formatting in this story makes it next to impossible to read. Only one person talks in a paragraph.
schedule
January 4, 2006 at 12:00 AM
No offense, but it's hard to tell what good ideas you might have - your formatting is impossible to read, your punctuation and capitalization are atrocious, and your writing style inconsistent.
You need to take a good look at some well written erotica, and take note, then try it again. You might be good, but who can tell? Please don't take offense, I mean this to be helpful, not critical.
You need to take a good look at some well written erotica, and take note, then try it again. You might be good, but who can tell? Please don't take offense, I mean this to be helpful, not critical.
schedule
December 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
heh ^^;;; sorry, a typo, i just wrote a story where i used my name, and i got confused and put my name instead of turki ^^;;;;;;;;;;;;; Sorry I'm just a gay uke, we make mistakes too
schedule
December 22, 2005 at 12:00 AM
This is a good story, but im not sure if it really happened because you keep saying Turki, then in the next sentence you use Steven? I got confused. Please help me understand!
schedule
November 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Not bad
the sex scenes could have been a little more detailed
and slowed down a bit.
I found the storyline pretty interesting though.
Update!
the sex scenes could have been a little more detailed
and slowed down a bit.
I found the storyline pretty interesting though.
Update!