rate_review Reviews

lol about that sex scene . . . I reread it and well it sucks, I attempted to fix it and its now up. I know I change the story to much after I\'ve put it up. So shoot me.

lol thats fine, ch 4 is up, enjoy

argh *slaps forehead* I posted chapter 2 twice, I fixed it now.

uhh .. it\'s the same chapter ::holds up two fingers:: twice. might wanna fix that.

other than that, pretty good. a few errors here and there, but i\'ll live.

Thank you for your comment. I thought I made that clear in the first paragraph of the story. I reread it and couldn\'t seem to explain it better. I\'ll reiterate it further down the story, maybe that will help. Basically Tristan is extremely sensitive and he turns inward. Instead of suffering from the pain of reality, he administers his own pain to forget reality. It’s a catch 22.

you need to work on a bit more backgound of what you are talking about; not neccessarily the world they are in but the topics you are talking about in general. Example: suddenly assuming people understand the nature of Tristan\'s madness. Otherwise, I thought this was a very good story, I look forward to reading more of it, keep up the good work, you have talent.