schedule
August 13, 2007 at 12:00 AM
This was a really good start to a story.
I wish it could be completed.
For improvements, it is hard to say, because it is impossible to know where the author intended to go. But assuming that the author intended utilize the characters, going slowly and developing the characters would have given readers an emotional connection to them. Then, when something happened to the characters, the readers would be impacted emotionally.
But otherwise, this story was off to a good start.
I wish it could be completed.
For improvements, it is hard to say, because it is impossible to know where the author intended to go. But assuming that the author intended utilize the characters, going slowly and developing the characters would have given readers an emotional connection to them. Then, when something happened to the characters, the readers would be impacted emotionally.
But otherwise, this story was off to a good start.
schedule
February 21, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Great story! I\'ve been checking back frequently since I read the first chapter. Please keep going with it! :D