rate_review Reviews

that was not what i was expecting...

wow bravo lol

Sorry, but I laughed my ASS off at ""It will only hurt for a moment I promise! Let me go in and out of your hot, sexy pussy! It will get better!" Darien cried out as he broke out in sweat." Sorry, but... no. Just no.

good point.. anon... ill go fix that now... thanks for the clue in i guess???

I'd say that "Just A Fantasy" was better than this one - the pace is good in both, but I think your descriptions are better than your dialogue, to be hon In In one of the other reviews, one bit of dialogue seemed to have the wrong effect. Not that humour's not good in erotica! :) I just think that maybe the dialogue could be... I don't know... ra little more realistic? Some of the dialogue seems a little clichéd at times, but other than this, I think it's pretty good. I hope this doe com come out as sounding pedantic...